New Thing #307: Zipfy Mini Luge


My mother-in-law got myself and Audrey matching big person/little person versions of the Zipfy Mini Luge this Christmas.

I was a bit skeptical when I first opened up the midget racer. It’s just so tiny…and more than a little phallic looking. But I soon found myself zipping down the hill next to Audrey and going faster and further than I ever had on any other sled.

It takes some getting used to in terms of steering (as the video clearly shows) but by the time I left I was really getting the hang of it.

Oddly enough, I found the kid-sized version much easier to keep straight than the adult. I suspect it has something to do with my total lack of an ass.

Can’t wait to hit the slopes again!


New Thing #301: The Five Doctors


Every Christmas Eve my wife and I curl up in front of the television to watch some sort of terrible piece of entertainment. It all started with a bootlegged version of The Star Wars Holiday Special some years ago and, well, has only gotten better from there.

This year I wanted to see The Five Doctors, a Doctor Who special from the 80s that (sort of) reunites five incarnations of the Doctor into one storyline. I say sort of because Tom Baker makes about a two minute appearance somewhere near the start and a two second one at the end.

And although not nearly as bad as watcing Bea Arthur serenade an alien in a Star Wars cantina, it was still pretty aweful. 


New Thing #281: Ovaltine



I think I was born a generation too late for Ovaltine. Instead I’d beg my mom for some Nestlé Quick whenever we went to the grocery store. In fact, I don’t think I’d ever heard of Ovaltine outside of A Christmas Story.

But I found a jar of it in, of all things, the international food aisle while I was doing my own grocery shopping today.

I really didn’t know what to expect. For some reason I thought it was supposed to be a healthy drink; something akin to Metamucil. But no, it’s basically chocolate milk mix with a bit of Maltesers thrown in.

Which, when it comes down to it, isn’t a bad thing at all.

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